Lowcountry weather survival: A guide for Canadians

Ok, it's been a few years now, and I figure I've experienced enough weather here to make up a weather survival guide for any other Canucks who should choose to move here.

General weather: Humid. Days of less than 70% humidity are rare. 90% to 1000% humidity are normal. When you step outside, you'll feel like you're either swimming or drowning. Spring and fall are hot. Summers are even hotter. No need for anything much heaver than a fall jacket.

December/January: Might need the jacket for the mornings. Sweater is fine during the day. Most days are like a cool fall day. Might get below 0C on cooler nights. On very rare occasions, you might even have to scrape the windshield of your car. Don't expect any snow at all. If there is, it will simply be a light dusting that will barely cover the grass. This will however incite people to panic about the weather and make them race out to the stores and stock up on several days worth of provisions. Copious amounts of salt will be spread on the road. The snow wil be gone once the sun hits it. City will remain shut down for the next day or two. On the very rare night that it does snow, it's safer to stay home. Roads will be very icy if there is snow and nobody knows how to drive. Everything will probably have shut down anyway.

February: Starting to warm up a little. Can probably go back to wearing shorts and t-shirts. Those from warmer areas of Canada might want to stick with long pants.

March/April: Ahh, summer's beginning. Break out the shorts and sandals. Don't forget the sunscreen. If you never burned before back home, you will here. If you park your car outside, make sure to buy one of those windshield screens for your car. Go enjoy the beach for the next few months while the days are still tolerable. It's also the rainy season. Keep your umbrella handy.

May: The hot part of summer is beginning. Early mornings and late evenings are still tolerable.

June: It's getting hot outside. Make sure the AC in your house and car is in good working order. Hurricane season starts. Pay attention to the Weather Channel. Did the 1st degree burns on your hands convince you to buy a windshield screen for your car?

July/August: Even hotter now. Glasses fog up going from AC-cooled buildings to the outside. Stepping outside drains all your life energy from you. You feel like collapsing into a steaming puddle of goo. You want to take off more clothes to get cool, but then you'd be naked. And then you'd get suburned. Stay inside where it's cool for the next couple of months. Hurricane season is in full swing. Keep that umbrella handy.

September: Finally starting to cool down. It's safe to go back outside now. Hurricane season is just past the peak, so keep an eye on the weather stations. Feels like late summer for most Canadians.

October: Starting to feel a little bit like late summer/early fall. Decent temperatures again, hurricane season is winding down. You can enjoy being outside once again. Don't expect to see leaves changing colour. They just turn brown and fall off the trees.

November: Might need to break out the sweater now. Weather is most like mid fall.